While there were plenty of other issues on my part that lead to the downfall of my previous relationship, a large part was my Radical Feminism and the Trans Movement piece and the paranoia I had over the trans community turning on me for that post. Hell I’ve met and spoken with some self identified gender critical feminists who were genuinely nice people that I got along with. I’m not saying that all who take issue with or criticize the trans movement are privileged abusers who can’t stand it when they don’t get their way. It also goes without saying that those who are used to being treated as authority figures will respond to not being treated as an authority figure by not treating that person as a human being. I once heard a saying that told how some people think respecting someone means to treat them as like a human being and how others think it means to treat them as an authority figure. There is the ever present paradox with many transphobes in that they want to be heard but they don’t want to hear. My Radical Feminism and the Trans Movement piece AND my Trans People are Not Responsible for their Mistreatment piece attracted the attention of angry TERFs who felt entitled for me to dignify their blatantly dehumanizing remarks and who proceeded to say I’m not a genuine feminist for not being a self flagellating whipping girl. But there is one last thing I would like to say before I make my argument for the TERFs that are reading this. Regardless there is a lot of overlap between the two groups and I have seen the “trans activists are abusive narcissists” argument tossed around by both gender critical feminists and right wingers, so I would instead like to focus on the argument itself. That’s not to say that there are no TERFs that aren’t uneducated bigots (far from it) and that there are no right wingers that merely overthink implications without listening to trans people, but I do notice more of a distinction. The short version is that I think TERFs often overthink the implications of transgendity and are hostile towards trans activists based around a fundamental misunderstanding of it, while right wing transphobes are typically uneducated bigots who refuse to question traditional values. To get one thing out of the way, one may ask why I focus so much on TERFs rather than regular garden variety transphobes? TERFs are a rather fringe section of the feminist movement that is mostly trans positive while transphobia in the far right is far more widespread. While there are certainly some that don’t even have anything against trans acceptance or inclusion that simply think that most trans activists would consider them transpbobes anyway, I would know since I have met some of them, there is still a sizable amount who will say that the above is a strawman… yet who still believe some variation on the above. The second and likely larger group are those that think this paragraph is an exaggerated strawman and that they don’t actually think that way. In this case, such a thing is obviously projection due to a refusal to accept a major human rights movement because one would rather believe their own innate prejudiced instincts than have a shred of human decency. The first are those that unironically believe everything I just said because they are biological essentialist sociopaths and will then claim it is “proof” of my narcissism.
What’s that? That sounds morally disgusting and abusive? Congratulations you’re a decent human being! Those that take issue with this last paragraph will likely have one of two responses. Also ableism and violence.ĭid you know that being a trans person and caring about how you are treated by cis people is inherently selfish? Did you know that when some douchebag calls trans women “mentally ill men with mutilated dicks” that WE are the ones that are selfish for calling them assholes? Did you know that having hatred and contempt for women who literally think our existence is misogynistic and that claim we are a danger to women by nature of said existence means we are abusers who only care about ourselves and fetishize womanhood? Trigger Warning: Transphobia, and lots of it.
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